Category Archives: I <3 Space

5 Alternate Endings to Gravity

WOWWWW. Whaat. a. MOVIE. No, what a FILM. Like two thumbs up, five stars. All the way.

But I noticed some reviews on Rotten Tomatoes that made me seriously question my immediate reaction.  These intellectual cinephiles bring up good points that are hard to ignore:

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I thought about it and here are some different endings that could make everyone happy.

EXT. OCEAN — DAY

Sandra Bullock’s pod crash lands into the water. She opens up the door.

She’s landed right next to CAPTAIN PHILLIPS BOAT.

A SOMALI PIRATE points a gun at her.

Somali Pirate: I’m the captain now

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EXT. OCEAN — DAY

Sandra Bullock opens the pod door. The ship begins to sink. She tries to swim out. Fishes are all around her.

Suddenly, the fishes go into formation.  They begin to sing UNDER THE SEA. Sandra gulps for BREATH, but can’t get out.

URSULA appears out of nowhere.

Ursula : Darling it’s better. Down where it’s wetter.

Sandra grows a MERMAID TAIL.  She breathes again.

Ursula (whispers, low): Take it from me

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INT. SPACE POD — DAY

Sandra braces herself as she CRASHES into the ocean. She sees water splashing up against the door window.

Sandra tries to push the door open. It won’t budge. She sees something float by the window.

It’s WILSON THE VOLLEYBALL

EXT. OCEAN — DAY

We pull back to see the space pod and Wilson float side by side.

GOD ONLY KNOWS by the Beach Boys plays as we FADE TO BLACK.

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EXT. BEACH — DAY

Sandra struggles up onto the Earth. She feels the sand between her fingers. Finally – she’s made it. She’s home.

She looks up.

APES roam the planet.

This isn’t Earth.

An ORANGUTAN leaps up and ROARS.

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EXT. BEACH — DAY

Sandra walks out of the ocean. She smiles to herself.

Sandra Bullock: Houston, we have a problem.

She chuckles quietly. She begins to laugh.

EXT. SMALL ASIAN VILLAGE — DAY

A rumble of laughter can be heard from a distance. Villagers look at each other, confused.

Ext. MOUNTAIN RANGE — DAY

Sandra Bullock’s laughter continues to echo.

EXT. NEW YORK CITY — DAY

Tourists peer out from the Empire State building – where is this powerful chortle coming from?

EXT. MARS — DAY

GEORGE CLOONEY plays fetch with the MARS ROVER. He hears a laugh unlike any he’s ever heard. A smile creeps across his face.

George Clooney: Atta girl.

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Hey Alfonso, I hope you’re listening. Keep these in mind for GRAVITY 2: ALL THE WEIGH HOME

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